Elf

Elves live in trees. I don’t mean to be racist about it but most of them do. They have neat off-the-ground homes which protect them from ground ants, floods, short people and the disabled. They have a national love of weaving and singing, and all children are required to take archery training for the first 10 years of their life. That’s right, even infants can kick your arse with a bow.

Since they live in the forests, their clothes are usually eco-sustainable forest weave, free from chemicals and dyes and 100% recyclable. I also like to imagine that they dry and fall off after a while so if an elf is out of the forest for too long her clothes might spontaneously disappear.

They have pointy ears and sharp eyes so they perceive the crap out of things and they’re naturally nimble – probably from all the shooting bows and walking along tree branches they do as infants. They are related to the Eladrin race but the Eladrin are a bit “Hyacinth Bucket” about it.

Elf

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